(P)Roses from the Pandemic 05: All the times I've been assaulted
1994
Laney College Flea Market, Time Stamp: 1100
Cheaper Nintendo?
2 and Ray’s eyes lit up
Mom lets go of my hand
Dad helps them pick out a game
Why am I here?
1 Step, then 2 Step with my light up shoes
She grabs my hands “Churros?”, she asked
I gambled and said “Churros and snow cones!”
Churro on one hand, snow cone on the other
She carried me
My family seem to be out of sight
2005
Park Ave and MacArthur, Time Stamp: 1500
First year of AP classes
Mom sick
Dad work
Siblings? Help? No
Suppress your emotions and suck It up
You can only rely on yourself
NL is taking longer
Bestie and I were singing Say Ok
Gun shots to the glass door on the bus stop
Heart sinks
I throw up
2014
Civic Center, Time Stamp: 2000
Dress skirt, sneakers and a backpack
Compliance jargon, red-line edits, don’t go to law school
This is normal right?
22 selling my soul to capitalism?
I-Phone 5, cracked screen, cuts on my fingers not from hating myself
Guns out when suns not out
Here, take it
Shoves me, steps on my glasses
2014
Civic Center Pt.2, Time Stamp: 2000
New day, same faces
New heels, same feels
No lunch, no dinner
Did I witness an office romance in the corner office?
Heads down
Shinny Samsung S6, 2021 Phuong, why did I ever switch?
Guns out when suns not out
Plastic nub brushes my lips
“Shoot me”, I said.
Thinking, if I die today, I am okay with it
His hands start to shake, tremble
Confidence starts to dip
“Shoot me”, I said again.
Blank stares, I didn’t blink, the fog of devil creeps in
Light switch, click
I threw the phone to the brick ground
Shoved my Michael Kors stiletto into the screen
I don’t deserve nice things
2 New things ruined in less than a minute
Psycho, he called out and ran
I’ve been called worst by better people
2016
Home, Time Stamp: 2000
Pulling up in my drive-way
Spotted him a block away
Older, Asian, with a cane, a backpack, slow pace
I hope he is okay
No! Stop!
Stop that right now, not everyone is kind
Parked, rushed to my door step
How did he walk so fast?
Locked doors
I hear foot steps
My door knob turns
Knocks
Shakes my door
He shouted, “Open this door!”
“I need to ask you a question”
Turn off all my lights, taser on my right, switchblade on my left
Places backpack down, sits on my porch
Cops come, tell him to evacuate, this is private property
He said, “She owes me an answer”
He leaves
Cops make a report
I sit in two puddles
Sweat from yoga and tears from anger
I trust no one
2016
___ Night-Club Time Stamp: 2200
I’ve been lifting
Red dress
Who goes out like this anymore
Don’t be fooled by my eyes
I’m scanning exit signs
In case of a fire
A rapist
A serial killer
Grabs butt
Instant headlock
He crawls on the floor
I said, “If I twist one more time, you can die”
Steven said let him go
Security asks if I want his job
I cried on the drive back to Oakland
2018
40th and San Pablo Time Stamp: 700
72 and sunny
I am gonna wear a skirt today
Beyonce, B-Day Deluxe
72R, 72M, 72 all leads to work
All this empty space, little wins
Next stop, older man sits by me
Peeks over to my phone
Spots the Queen Bey
“Is that you? You look hot!”
Places his hand on my left knee
“I ride a motorcycle”
“You like motorcycles?”
I responded, “Then why are you on the bus?”
Hands shriveled, shrinked
Ego shrinked
Other things shrinked too
2019
Gaylords Time Stamp: 1900
Running an index and if formula on 20 different csvs
3 Men, 1 guards the door, other bathroom, and one spots me
Guns out when suns not out
Shoves holster down my throat
Heavy steel
Bullets lined up
Grabs my laptop and run
I guess Mastercard isn’t geting their settlement report tonight
I drive back home
3 reports
The Po, The Woe, The Bro
Po says “Did you fight back? Otherwise I can’t make a report cus no one was hurt”
Woe says “We’ve locked the laptop”
Ray calls “Am I late?”